Breakthrough

I've had this song, it's over a year old now. Actually the backbone, a little arpeggio progression, is probably well over three or four years old. But the SONG came about two Mays ago.

Then it just sat there. I really liked the song. Figured it could be a single. I liked it a lot. I didn't want to mess it up. So I got scared, and whenever I tried to work on it I'd get frustrated. Then I stopped working on it altogether.

I almost finished it last night. I got sick of wanting it to be perfect. I just wanted to finish it. I want to move on to the next thing. So I worked and worked and tried a whole new direction. And it sounds great. I can't wait to finish it, and I know exactly how the rest of it is going to go. This is huge.

Busy

This whole time I thought it was laziness, but now I realize I just have no time. I'm constantly making lists of Things I Need To Do, and constantly failing to get them all done because something goes wrong or I don't have enough time. And then there's the business of writing and recording songs...

It's nice to know that keeping music on my mind every day for the past month has made me aware of this, but not nice to know that I still barely get anything done regardless.

However, last night I made significant headway on a new song AND new video.

This is why I need a vacation, and this is why I'm taking one.

This picture has nothing to do with anything I'm writing.

I'm taking a trip. It will begin in early October, and end in late December. I have a lot to do in the next month.

One of those things is getting a new album out. Honestly, I don't know if I can do it. But I have to try. I'm already more than halfway there.

I have roughly 52 songs and demos in various states of completion, any one of which could end up on the album. Sometimes you can have too many options. This is what I've been struggling with all summer.

I have been doing more writing recently, and I've been working on a live set with the second official member of Lost on Purpose. We have a couple songs down and the harmonies are sounding incredible. We will start playing shows when I return. But for now I need to record this album. I need to make schedules. I can't afford to waste any free time. On top of this I still need to make several small trips for work, and will probably go on a small tour with my other band (The Ross Sea Party). I probably only have 35 days in Los Angeles from now til October.

Such is the life of an unknown musician.

The Neistat Brothers

My buddy told me about this new show on HBO that has zero publicity. It's about two brothers who film pretty much everything that happens to them - on iphones, point and shoots and 'real' movie-making cameras. Then the edit it together. They got their show in HBO. Incredible.

What's even more incredible is how inspiring the show is. I consider myself to be a pretty DIY artist - I've done everything on my own. But they put me to shame. Just watch the show if you have the chance. I flew through the entire first season in 24 hours.

Then I wrote another new song.

I don't really need new songs. I have dozens of old ones that are pretty good and deserve to be recorded. But I need to get in that zone. I need a new approach. I need to get crazy.

When the time comes I will be ready. And that will be soon, since I'm leaving the country.

Success

I wrote one song yesterday. And I actually quite like it.

Futility Quest

I still haven't written those two damn songs. Something always comes up. Last night I decided to make bagels on a whim. Not toast bagels... actually make them from scratch.

It's not about the songs, it's about the discipline. It's not easy. I'm a musician, yet I feel like I hardly ever write and record. Then again I've released six albums.

Today I have nothing planned except for seeing a show later in the evening. I'll have a couple hours free right after work. I already baked bagels so I can't use that as an excuse. I do need to work out (I might be running the Ninja Warrior course on Saturday... that's a whole other story) but that shouldn't take very long.

Oh, and then there's the issue of the next album. I've had a few songs finished for months, but then all my recording mojo flew out the window. I have a song that is a guaranteed single... and it's been in the same unfinished state for OVER A YEAR. I just can't figure out the ending. Then again I haven't sat down with it for more than 30 minutes.

So it goes.

Good and Bad

Well, the show on Wed night went really well considering the somewhat odd mega-Hollywood crowd. But I didn't sit down and crank out two songs like I had planned. There's always tonight...

But last night I got together with a possible new member of Lost on Purpose and ran through some songs. It sounded good. I consider that just as good, if not better, than writing something new. It's a step in a very positive direction.

I haven't recorded anything in a long time. I have over 50 demos to work on but I've been pushing the recent release of A Knight at the Crossroads too. Between those two things, the live version of LOP, my other band (The Ross Sea Party) and, oh yeah, LIFE, I find that my days are pretty packed, and times spent in front of the tv are a memory and luxury.

I'm at work now, making money so I can live in Los Angeles and occasionally work on music, and for once it looks like I might be stuck here well past 5 o'clock. If that doesn't happen I will have an hour and a half of 'free' time. I am putting it out here: if that happens I will write a couple songs. They won't be good, but I need to stay sharp.

No... Yeeeeessss...

So the other day I said I would sit down and write two songs. I didn't. I had a bunch of other things to do (clean my room, do laundry etc) aka the least cool reasons possible.

However, I had a band practice with my other band (The Ross Sea Party), and afterward a few of us stayed behind and worked on new songs, played around with a couple other ideas and generally had a great time just playing and experimenting... so much so that I didn't get out of there until 1 AM.

That, in my book, is just as good as writing 2 songs.

We have a show tonight in Hollywood and I still have tons to get done in my personal life, but I'll see if I can find a spare 40 minutes.

Oh, and I have to factor in training for the upcoming Ninja Warrior tryouts in LA.

This, ladies and gentlemen, is the life of an indie rock star.

Two Songs

Last week I got really frustrated with myself and my lack of musical production. I have dozens of partially-recorded songs that just sit around until I have the time and motivation to work on them, but it seems like nothing ever gets done.

So I decided to just sit down and write three new songs. I wanted them to suck - I didn't want to care and spend too much time on them, because what usually happens when I like a song is I stop working on it as soon as I hit a wall. Maybe I can't figure out the chorus, or the middle eight, or I can't think of good lyrics for the second verse. If it's not perfect I tend to quit. I wait for a moment of inspiration, often months or even years later (literally).

That's why I wanted to write three crappy songs. Just sit down and write without a care in the world. Finish the songs at any cost.

I did it once before, like five years ago. I wrote three songs in a day. One became Ophelia, on the Anniversary album.

Long story short, I did sit down and I got two songs out before losing steam. I like one of the songs a lot. I consider it a success. A very small success, but a success nonetheless. At least I did something.

I'm planning on doing it again tonight. This blog is going to be my motivation.

Restart

I'm going to start blogging regularly, I hope. I want to focus less on Lost on Purpose news, which is now primarily being done on facebook, but on the process of being an indie musician. I will focus on songwriting, or in many cases the lack thereof (too busy), of navigating PR, getting albums made, etc. The nuts and bolts of being a musician. We'll see how it goes.